Is Wallow in Self Pity One Of Your Personality Traits?

Self-pity is a psychological state of mind. I may sound harsh but it is a “choice” we make. It is always embarrassing for most of the people to realise and accept that they are a self-pitying themselves. Self pity is surprisingly very addictive.
Most women, get into this habit naturally when a life change occurs. Many Indian women, give up their active career at some point of their life. This gives rise to a myth that self-pitying is common during this phase of life. But, variably this is also true for people who haven’t had active careers. They forget to focus on their strengths and automatically get into the zone of doubting and pitying themselves.

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Following are the traits that show you wallow in self pity:

1. Do you constantly feel you’re not worth anything? Is worth in your dictionary,  directly proportional to your monetary income?
2. Even after managing whole lot of family responsibilities, do  you feel useless?
3. Are you self-absorbed and feel guilty for your past decisions?
4. Do you compare yourself to the working people around you and underrate own self unaware of whether they are doing well in their positions or not?
5. Do happy moments of life bring momentary pleasure or sometimes not even that?
6. Do you crave for sympathy?
7. Do you feel guilty conscious most times?
If you find yourself, saying yes to the above mentioned points, then you need to accept the fact that, these thoughts are mostly self-created. This is just an unconscious thought lingering over your mind. You can easily work around them and make yourself much happier.

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There are many ways to get over this depending upon your choice, but the first thing you need to do is - ACCEPT IT. Running away from the fact of being a self-pitying person wouldn’t help you much. Accepting, is the first step towards liberation of this attitude. Don’t let it consume you. You can choose to lift yourself, and lead a better life.


Shakun Vijay
A focused counselling professional with 4 years of experience in the areas of individual, family, relationship, work life conflict , student, child behaviour problems, career counselling etc. A patient listener without an attitude of judging people with intent to help them process their thoughts and let out their pent up feelings and emotions. Also a keen communicator and an extrovert personality, who loves to read & write fiction, party hard and is a big foodie.

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